Refuting the Top 10 Feminist Stereotypes

To begin with, I’d like to address the type of feminist that I am and, in so doing, prove that there is not only one way to be a feminist. People, especially in the South and even in my family, throw out those same old tired stereotypes of the hairy, lesbian, man-hater. I can assure you that I do not fit that description and neither do most of the feminists I have met.

In May of this year, DJ Nelson posted a list of the top 10 Feminist Stereotypes on the All Diva Media blog. They included the following:
1. Feminists hate men
2. Feminists hate the idea of family
3. Feminists are masculine and unattractive
4. Feminists hate God
5. Feminists don’t shave
6. Feminists are all pro-choice
7. Feminists can’t be stay at home moms
8. Feminists whine about everything
9. Men are not feminists
10. All people who label themselves as feminists believe in the exact same things

I refute every one of these stereotypes because:

1. I do not hate men but rather have about 3-7 crushes going on at any given time and definitely enjoy the company of men on a friendship and romantic level.

2. I LOVE my family and fully intend to have one of my own one day, biologically or by adoption.
3. I am about as girly girl as you can get. As for being unattractive, I like to think that I am not but I suppose beauty is in the eye of the beholder… and the media which I will address in later blogs I am sure. I certainly fit some of the media’s standards of “beauty” by staying fit, fashionable, and manicured with makeup, painted nails, styled hair, etc. but that is the Southern Belle in me wanting to be dolled up - As for if that is my willing choice or a socialized requirement that I subconsciously feel the need to meet, I am still processing. Either way I enjoy being girly and definitely break that masculine stereotype.

4. I most definitely do not hate God but love and worship him to the best of my ability as an active Christian. I do not feel that Feminism and Faith are mutually exclusive.

5. I shave regularly and feel bad for boys that don’t because the thought of armpit hair grosses me out and I feel like it would be a nuisance. I do question why women have to shave and why men, as a collective gender – not just the occasional swimmer - never do. Perhaps there will be a later blog on that.

6. I have not fully made up my mind on this. I hate the thought of an innocent life being ended before it has the chance to reach full potential but I also hate the idea of a woman and her body being controlled by the nearly all male government possibly forcing an unwanted pregnancy on a woman AND the less than loved/protected/encouraged/provided for existence that child might face. I often fall back to the separation of Church and State in that the government should not be influenced by religious doctrine so I would technically take a pro-choice stance though on a personal level I would never encourage abortion.

7. Feminists certainly can be stay at home moms – look to the first wave of the women’s movement in the 1800s. It was begun by middle class, white women, many of whom were stay at home moms who felt oppressed in that role and chose to change it, essentially becoming feminists. Women today can do the very same thing AND women can be feminists but still be a stay at home mom if they CHOOSE to and don’t feel oppressed. In fact, if I am afforded the opportunity to do just that and be with my future children while they are young and reaching so many firsts in their life, I will more than likely take it.

8. I don’t whine about everything but I do whine BUT who doesn’t. Don’t men whine? Don’t normal women whine? Don’t racists, sexists, politicians, homeless, teachers, doctors, Christians, Muslims, Americans, Australians, [insert any people group] whine!?! Furthermore, if one put the shoe on the other foot they might see why the other group has a reason to “whine” or perhaps more accurately, “pose a threat to the status quo” causing those in power to belittle the submissive group as “whiners” simply to preserve their position of power?

9. Sure men are feminists. I know some. You probably do too. We need more of them.

10. Heck no, we don’t all agree! But who does? See number 8; do they all agree? No, and why should they… that would be terribly boring.

Having said that, you may disagree with what I have just presented as my opinion and that is fine – that is Feminist in fact ;) I don’t expect you to agree with all that I have just mentioned and that is my point. Just as my answers break the mold of those stereotypes, others’ answers will break the mold of my answers further destroying those stereotypes. So go ahead and prove them wrong; we don’t all fit into one itty bitty box.