Something Borrowed: Walking down the Aisle & Wearing my Mom's Dress

I love family, stories, sentimental things, vintage items, and Southern belle classy couture.

Fortunately, my wedding dress - borrowed from my mom - fulfilled all of that. 

Sometime in late high school, my mom and I came across her wedding dress tucked away in a box in the back of a closet, covered by a layer of dust. We decided to pull it out, unsure of what we would find... partly expecting it to be yellowed, wrinkled, and in poor condition. 

Much to our surprise and delight, it was in fantastic condition - still bright white, fresh looking and barely wrinkled. Even better, when I tried it on, we realized it was almost a perfect fit. 

From that moment, I decided I wanted to wear her gown as my wedding dress. 

However, it wasn't until almost a decade later that I was married: this past May 17th. 

It was an outdoor wedding, riverside and under chandeliers hanging from oak trees - the perfect setting for a vintagey, southern-belle-like wedding dress: 

But I didn't just slip into the dress that Saturday. Below is the story of the transformation of my mom's dress into the wedding dress of my dreams :)

My now husband proposed to me at Thanksgiving but I didn't return home from grad school until Christmas break. It was then that my mom and I dug out that box in the back of her closet and - with fingers crossed - opened it, worried that it might have lost some of its impressiveness since the preservation seal had been broken when we opened the box nearly 10 years prior. 

Much to our amazement, the dress was still in great condition. This is when I tried it on in our living room last Christmas: 

It was a little big and I needed to de-1980s the sleeves and add my own personality with touches of my favorite color, purple, but other than that we were thrilled with how it looked over 30 years after my mom wore it. 

This is a picture of my mom from her wedding day back in 1982; rather than purple, hers had pink details with flowers at the neckline and along the ruffled hem:

Plus, you won't believe it BUT my mom still had the Brides magazine that she first saw her dress in!?! It was showcased on the front cover: 

My mom had loved how different that dress was but never expected to actually be able to find it - she was married before the age of google and the far-reaches of the internet to track down her dream dress ;) Fortunately, as fate would have it, after several unsuccessful shopping trips, she stumbled upon THAT dress and upon trying it on, she knew she had to have it. She called my grandmother who drove to the store and agreed that it was the perfect fit and look for my mom so they bought it on the spot. 

To turn my mom's perfect dress into my perfect dress, we weren't sure how much it would cost and who on earth we could trust to cut, sew and update the dress. Fortunately, my fabulous wedding planner, Bethany Boles Hewitt, told us of the equally fabulous seamstress, Pat Wilcox. 

My mom and I set up a meeting with Mrs. Pat and I invited my granny along as well. Mrs. Pat was affordable, sweet, creative and totally got our vision for the dress. I described what I was hoping for and she magically made it happen. We met with her 4 times: my Christmas break in December, my Spring break in March, the end of April after the semester was over and then early May right before the wedding.

Here are a few photos of the process... 

After my first visit with Mrs. Pat, she sent me on a mission to find the material that she would turn into the details. I picked out purple and silvery chiffon + a few lace trims with the help of one of my bridesmaids, Anna. 

Here is an example of  one of the end products. This is a close up of one of the chiffon flowers she just whipped up from scratch, including individual beads sewn in to shimmer in the sunlight since I was having an outdoor wedding - her attention to detail and her creativity was phenomenal.

This was the bare bones of the dress without the details and with the sleeves taken down considerably: 

But Mrs. Pat didn't waste anything so she took parts of the sleeves (with all that 1980s excess) and added them to flowers and other details on the gown. She truly reinvented all of parts of my mom's dress. Here are a few more photos of the in between phase when we were experimenting with a few different options:

               

And these were photos from the final fitting:

During this process, we got to know Mrs. Pat and she got to know us. Seeing my mom and granny there at every visit and also learning my love for family and sentimental touches, Mrs. Pat emailed me the sweetest idea. She said it used to be a tradition to add the bride's name and wedding date to the hem of the wedding dress passed down. She wanted to know if I would like for her to add my mom's wedded name and wedding date along with my would-be wedded name and wedding date to the hem of the dress. I did not hesitate because I adored the idea. It was a sweet moment when we revealed it to my mom at the final fitting a couple weeks before the wedding; the embroidery is pictured below: 

The other mushy gushy but super sweet moment of wearing my mom's dress down the aisle was that my Daddy got to see both my mom and his daughter as a bride in the same gown. Here he is escorting me to the ceremony: 

So after 4 visits and about $500 with countless hours of cutting, creating and sewing, Mrs. Pat took this:

And turned it into the classy, sassy, Southern-belle like wedding dress of my dreams with touches of purple, sparkle and lace... and a story to tell

And the dress of my dreams was the perfect fit for the day I married the man of my dreams :) 

I'm not sure he and I will have a little girl one day but you better believe my mom and I had the wedding dress preserved just in case I one day have a girl who wants to carry on the tradition and wear our dress at her wedding... 

Updates from my Arkansas Family Wedding: Truth IS stranger than fiction

My only girl cousin - Mary Beth - got married this past weekend and it was the MOST EPIC wedding I have ever heard of. I was honored when she asked me to be one of her bridesmaids but I didn't know what all I was getting myself into ;)

To begin with, this wedding started off a little Redneck from the get-go because of 3 reasons:

1. It was a destination wedding but not to Cancun or the Bahamas like many of my friends guessed when they heard I was going. Nope, it was a destination wedding to (drum-roll please!).... Arkansas. When my friends heard this they asked "Why!?! What the heck is in Arkansas?" I tried to assure them that the destination - Hot Springs - was actually quite lovely but they were suspicious, still thinkin' it would be a little country. I told them that no, we would not be duck hunting after they got hitched and we would not be wearing camo down the aisle but they didn't quite believe me.
2. The wedding was happening on Halloween weekend so this conjured up strange ideas in my friends' minds of wedding decor even less classy than camo... something like cob-webs or skeletons hanging around. I am happy to report, though, that the wedding was very classy with ivory and purple decorations and only happened to fall on Halloween weekend; the bride and groom were not obsessed and doing some spooky-themed wedding!
3. One of the bridesmaids (the bride's sister-in-law) was pregnant... AND had a black eye. No worries - there isn't any domestic violence going on; she just slipped in the kitchen and caught her eye on the counter but, obviously, this looks bad when you have a battered and pregnant bridesmaid!

And then the Redneckyness just ratcheted itself up alllll weekend long as everything unfolded at the wedding. Below, you'll find the text updates I sent to my friends throughout the weekend that document the whole drama:

Thursday, October 27th

This first text was sent within minutes of my family picking me up. My uncle (the father of the bride) just nonchalantly said this as he shared the game-plan for our afternoon...

3:07 pm - "We gotta pick up a keg." - my Uncle Russell            

And after we had the keg loaded up, another memorable quote from my uncle...

3:32 pm -  Now we need to run to Walmart. Yea, we need to pick up a tree. Oh and we need a goat.

These were props for his speech at the wedding. He never got the goat but he found a HUGE tree (it was so tall that it bent over at the top where it hit the ceiling) because it tied into a story from Mary Beth's childhood. The whole thing was really cute, I promise! 

 

Friday, October 28th

7:20 pm - Wedding update.... Good news: my dress and shoes fit! Bad news: guess who is walking me down the aisle? The one GAY groomsman. Yep. My luck ;)

And within 5 minutes of meeting me, he tells me that he is gay, that he cheated on his boyfriend who then decided to break up with him. That, he said, was why he was drinking heavily but he hoped they''d get back together. 

However, by the end of the weekend his ex-boyfriend was already in a new relationship so the gay groomsman lost all hope and increased his drinking - so much so that he literally fell down the stairs. 

10:58 pm - So the rehearsal dinner ended with the Maid of Honor stumbling drunk calling another guest a stripper... and she apparently really IS!?! Plus, there is a prostitute present too. I wish I was making this up. I feel like I'm living in a Jerry Springer episode!?!

When the bride tried to speak with her to tell her to quit drinking and get her self together, things got physical. She cussed out the bride and threw her phone across the hotel lobby and broke something. There was shoving and screaming and crying.

Also, the pastor's wife and groom's grandmother saw ALL of this. 

The Best Man and baby-daddy to the Maid of Honor's kid (who was the ring bearer) intervened and broke up the fight. 

Saturday, October 29th -

THE WEDDING DAY!!!

12:01 am - The. Cops. Came. 
                   The Maid of Honor has been kicked out of the wedding. 
                   No lie.

6 cops (!?!) came up to our suite because of the incident in the lobby and nearly arrested the Maid of Honor. She was crying and upset AND she was in the room with the wedding gown and her bridesmaid dress. 

We were worried she might do something to destroy it so the bride's brother's girlfriend (known as "Little Bit"" because she is not even 5 feet and probably about 90 pounds) just marched in there and rescued the dresses before they could be harmed. She is now known as  "Sassy Pants" for her gutsyness.

The ex-Maid of Honor was so upset that she tried to walk home (barefooted without a phone since it broke when she threw it in the lobby) to Oklahoma from Arkansas!?! We ultimately got her back in the hotel and moved her to another room. 

Then they were concerned she might crash the wedding so my daddy was put on stand-by as potential security to stand at the doors during the wedding. However, before my daddy had to do that, the baby-daddy arranged for the ex-Maid of Honor to get a ride home after the bride decided this drama was too much. 
  
12:36 am - K, another update: more good news.... I got a promotion. Yours truly is now the Maid of Honor. I guess I have to whip up a speech now???

In addition to my promotion, the groom's sister was promoted to bridesmaid and - by some miracle - the ex-Maid of Honor's dress fit. This seemed right anyways for her - as family - to be included in the bridal party so everything worked out how we felt it should have always been.

..................................

Then we went to bed to try and rest after all of that!
And the wedding went off without a hitch :) No one cried - except for the gay groomsman. 

6:04 pm - Final (?) wedding update: I didn't trip and the speech was alright so everything went  well... EXCEPT my bouquet caught on fire. Yep. Can't wait to share ALL the details ;)

Ok. I was perhaps having too much fun with these updates at this point. I admit, that one was a bit misleading. My bouquet really did catch on fire but not as I was walking down the aisle. Instead, it happened while we were all sitting down for dinner at the reception. The bride said,  "Sarah! Your bouquet is burning!" and sure enough, the candle below the vase it was resting in began to burn the flowers. It left a 2 or 3 inch black, charred hole in the bottom of the ivory hydrangea bouquet :/
 
10:21 pm - Spoke too soon. Another update: on the way home, my cousin's car got hit by a deer. Good God almighty!!!

Fortunately, she is ok, though the car isn't. It was just ridiculous and so redneck. I mean you cannot make this stuff up!?!

As the night wound down, we ended up in the lobby where there was live music and all sorts of crazy drunk people dressed in costumes for Halloween; this all added to the bizareness of all that had happened with our wedding party. 

And the groom's mom had a bit too much to drink and ended up ordering a round of "buttery nipples" for the bride's family; now that is a kind gesture but if that isn't the most awkward drink title I've ever heard of, I don't know what is! 

Sunday, October 30th

12:18 pm - The wedding is over but I have another update that I found when helping everyone load up the cars. This was a wedding gift for the bride and groom. It is a "dictionary" book safe, complete with a pistol. I am NOT making this up, hence this photographic evidence ;)

I have no words. The picture speaks for itself. 


1:15 pm - So final (for real???) Arkansas wedding update: we had too many people and too many things for everything to fit in the truck. So, leaving for the airport, my youngest cousin - bless him - had to ride in the BACK of the truck. This picture is him packed in beside the keg in the truck-bed! THE END!!!!!!!!!!!

Yea, so... epic, right?


All in all, though, it was a beautiful wedding and they are happily married on their honeymoon right now so all is well that ends well :) 

How Our Luggage Had a Better Vacation than Us ( and other tid-bits of bad news from our Andrews Family Adventure to Nova Scotia)

It's true. Our luggage had a better vacation than we did.

We left America together with all of our luggage BUUUUUTTTTT we didn't all make it to our destination that way.

DAY 1 OF OUR VACA:

Bad News Number 1: 

We were on the tarmack for an hour and a half in Atlanta. They kicked 3 people off the plane because we were "over crowded." Thank goodness none of us were selected as one of the 3.

Bad News Number 2:

They pulled some luggage off the plane.... "some" being 30 bags and there were only 70 people on the plane!?! We thought there was a bomb or something because what looked to be a swat team of sorts came rushing out to remove the luggage. Fortunately, there was no bomb BUT they said the bags were removed because there was a weight imbalance due to too much fuel.

"Too much fuel"????? Dear God, how do you not anticipate the equivalent of 30 bags worth of extra fuel?

That sounds like poor planning to me. I was beginning to get VERY nervous about this plane taking off.
But, thank the Lord, we took off - and landed - alright and made it safely to Halifax.

Bad News Number 3: 

We made it; our bags did not.


Well, in full disclosure, I must admit that one bag did make it: mine. This, however, was for the best of the group, I swear ;) Not only did it mean my spirits would remain high but also, I am the notorious over-packer of the family. Had my Daddy's bag been the only one to arrive, we would have been screwed; he packed like 2 pairs of pants and 3 shirts for the whole week while I, on the other hand, had like 10 pairs of pants, 12 shirts, 4 jackets and lotion, band-aids, Q-tips, etc ;)

Ok, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration but you get the picture: I came prepared! So I had lots to share :)

Bad News Number 4: 

We were told that the other 3 bags would all arrive together via Detroit that night at 9:30 pm.We had reached the airport at about 4 so we figured we would just explore the downtown area and grab dinner before swinging in to get the bags once they arrived.

They. Did. Not. Arrive. At. 9:30.

There were storms in Detroit so the plane was delayed til 12:30am.

DAY 2 OF OUR VACA:

Bad News Number 5: 

We checked into a hotel for the night. The bags still had not arrived at 12:30; the flight from Detroit was canceled. Annnnnnnnnnnndddddd, it still had not arrived the next morning. The next available flight out of Detroit was not until that night so we pressed on to our final destination leaving our address for them to courier our bags to.

Bad News Number 6:

Our address we had been given (and the one we gave to the airline to send our bags to) was incorrect.

No lie.


Not only did that throw us off when we were trying to find the house we were renting for that week but we thought there was no way in heck the courier would get our bags to the right place now.

Bad News Number 7: 

My period arrived a week early. I don't say this to gross y'all out or to explain my pissy behavior with the airline (believe me, their lack of efficiency would have brought out my frustration regardless!) BUT I tell you because it is relevant later ;)

Bad News Number 8: 

When we finally reached our rented home at the correct address we had to find the key. It was left in the bbq pit... sketch. BUT it wouldn't open the door!?! It was getting stuck and wouldn't turn. We didn't know what we were going to do.

While my brother and Daddy - both engineers - were diligently working on jiggling the lock just right, all of a sudden my mom appears from inside the house and opens the door.

She had walked around the house and found an open window, managed to climb in and saved the day :)

This was a re-enactment to document mom's determination... nothin' a woman won't do to get to the bathroom a lil quicker ;)

Bad News Number 9:
Next, after having to wait an hour, we finally meet our land lord, big Dave. He informs us that the dishwasher definitely does not work and that the washing machine may - or may not - work. We were really counting on that washing machine to clean my mom, dad, and brother's one pair of clothes. Fortunately, it did work and we washed their outfits each night. Bless them.

Bad News Number 10: 

Big Dave also informed us about the recent coyote attack on a nearby hiking trail. When we asked what had happened he said, and I quote:

"A young woman was attacked and killed by a coyote... they're not sure what happened but they figure she was probably menstruating - somethin' like that that attracted them."

In case you've forgotten, refer back to Bad News Number 7 ;)

Oh, joy to the world. Now I was certain I'd be attacked and killed out on the trails. My family had the same thought as they quickly shot me a glance after he mentioned that; I forgot to mention that they were all well aware of my predicament because we had to make an emergency tampon trip to the grocery store!

Good and Bad News Number 11: 

Mom's bag arrived in Nova Scotia :) But not my Daddy's or my brother's :(

It seems our bags were not all together as we'd been promised.

But, as I noted, our bags had a better vacation than ours. It seems mom's had taken a trip from Detroit to New York??? However, we still did not have the bag. We were FOUR HOURS away in our rental home. They promised to fly it over first thing in the morning.

 DAY 3 OF OUR VACA:  

Bad News Number 12: 

Mom's bag was not flown out first thing in the morning which would have gotten it to us in an hour. Instead, it was sent via car which would take 4 hours AND, in case you've forgotten, refer back to Bad News Number 6: they did not have our correct address. Though we had called and given the airport the correct one, we had no way to know they had forwarded that information onto the courier.

Fortunately, though, Mom's bag did arrive by early afternoon :)

Bad News Number 13: 

Big Dave had warned us about bugs being out. We figured we're from South Carolina and have dealt with mosquitoes out the wazoo so we'd be fine.

Wrong.

Their mosquitoes are like small birds.... easily twice as big as ours.

When we saw the locals wearing these, we were worried:

We bought bug-spray or "fly lube" as the locals called it but the bugs were persistent. When we smacked at them it looked like we were mass murderers because blood would get alllllll over our hands : /

Bad News Number 13 - Part 2:

Their mosquito bites turn into huge welts so it effectively looked like I had contracted chicken pox or something! I attracted a LOT of them so I guess it just means I was really sweet ;)


Bad News Number 14: 
We finally tracked down my dad and brother's bags... in Bangor, Maine. I told you our luggage had a better vacation than us! However, we could not confirm if they made it to the Nova Scotia airport or not because we could not find the phone number to the airport they had been sent to and for some strange reason, the airport we had flown into did not have this other airport's number either.

Bad News Number 14 - Part 2:

We called 411 for information to get the airport's number... but the automated response was in French. We don't speak French. I'm sad to say my semesters of French were of no help to me so we couldn't understand it :(

DAY 4 OF OUR VACA:

The final 2 bags arrive at last!!!!!!!!!!!! 

And, though we had a lot of bad news in the beginning, our vacation was ultimately a success. 

We went on beautiful hikes: 

Saw gorgeous scenery:

 

Kayaked St. Ann's Bay: 

And even took in a little Canadian history at Fortress of Louisbourg and the Alexander Graham Bell museum.

 Me and the people of the fort after dancing "Lord Byron's Maggot" - I wish I could say I made the name up BUT I didn't

But, wouldn't you know it... 

Bad News Number 15: 

Even though my Daddy said lightning doesn't strike the same place twice, optimistic that we'd have smooth sailing all the way back to South Carolina, our flights were delayed coming home :( 

Despite 14 hours of travel back home, I'm happy to report that ALL of our bags made it back the same time we did!

And while I would NEVER recommend Delta airlines to anyone after this fiasco, I highly recommend that you visit Nova Scotia :)

"You may all go to Hell - and I will go to Texas"... to celebrate Women's History Month

  

You may all go to Hell - and I will go to Texas. 

Those aren't my words. They're Davy Crockett's. 

But he was onto something. 

Though I don't wish anyone to go to hell, I do wish you'd all go to Texas! 

I recently had the pleasure of visiting over my Spring break. I saw lots of cute cowboys strutin their stuff in their blue jeans, boots and over-sized belt-buckles but I wondered why do they get all the credit as the tough Texans.

I figured there had to be some impressive Texas women. 

And I was right!

Since March is Women's History Month I thought it absolutely appropriate to do (and share) a little research on them ;) 

  

This website had several impressive Texan cowgirls; here are some of my favorites: 

• Angelina: She is the only woman to have a Texas river, a county, and a national forest named for her. In 1690, the name Angelina was given at baptism to a Native-American woman who was educated by Spanish friars at the Mission of San Juan Bautista on the Rio Grande and perhaps also at the College of Zacatecas. She spoke Spanish as well as several Indian languages so she became a translator, including translating for an expedition that founded the Alamo and the city of San Antonio. 

 

•  Sarah Horton Cockrell: (1819 – 1892) She was a very successful businesswoman who built the first iron bridge over the Trinity River at Dallas in 1872 and Dallas' first three-story hotel. Left a widow with small children in 1858, all she had was a stack of debts and her husband's ferry business. She thought big and invested wisely. She set up her own corporations, the Dallas Bridge Company, and the S. H. Cockrell Co., which owned a flour mill. When she died in 1892, her properties were so extensive that her will had to be published in pamphlet form. 

   

•  Bessie Coleman: (1892-1926) She was one of the first licensed female pilots and the world's first black female aviator and barnstormer, had a spectacular but brief career in air shows. She was born in Atlanta, Texas, the twelfth of 13 children. Her mother, an illiterate former slave, borrowed books so Bessie could learn to read. She encouraged young blacks to become involved in aviation. She once refused to perform in Waxahachie, where she had grown up, until blacks were allowed to use the same entrance as whites to the exhibition. Black aviators memorialized her by naming their flying clubs and their magazine after her. In 1990, a street to Chicago's O'Hare Airport was named Bessie Coleman Drive, and, in 1995, the U.S. Postal Service issued a commemorative stamp in her honor.

 

•  Sarah T.Hughes: (1896-1985) She was an attorney, legislator, women's rights activist, United Nations supporter, and Texas' first female state and federal judge. A member of a Dallas law firm from 1923 to 1935, she was elected to her first term in the Texas House of Representatives as a Democrat in 1930 and voted "Most Valuable Member" her second term.She was national president of the Federation of Business and Professional Women's Clubs in 1952. The national organization spearheaded her nomination for the vice presidency on the Democratic Party ticket that year, the first woman ever considered, though she withdrew her name. And, after Kennedy's assassination in 1963, she administered the Presidential oath of office to Lyndon B. Johnson.
  
   
• Mildred "Babe" Didrikson Zaharias: (1911 – 1956) She earned more medals and set more records in more sports than any other athlete, male or female, in the twentieth century. She dominated the women's events at the 1932 Olympics, winning three gold medals and setting world records in the 80-meter hurdles and the javelin throw. She excelled in every sport she tried and, in particular, won every existing women's golf title. In 1953, she was elected to the Texas Sports Hall of Fame. The only race she ever lost was to cancer, in 1956. 

• Sarah Ragle Weddington: (1945 – ) She is best known for having successfully argued the 1973: Roe v. Wade abortion rights case before the U.S. Supreme Court. She was one of only 40 among 1,600 students at the law school at the University of Texas at Austin. She was active in the Texas women's movement, lobbied in the Texas Legislature for passage of the Equal Rights Amendment and was a founder of the Texas Women's Political Caucus. She was elected to the Texas House of Representatives in 1972 and helped with the following: 

• change the law that prevented women from getting credit cards in their own names
• stopped schools from firing pregnant teachers
•  improved the treatment of rape victims.

•  Also, under President Jimmy Carter, she became general counsel for the Department of Agriculture in Washington, an advisor to the president on women's issues, and later became a member of the White House senior staff. She now teaches at the University of Texas at Austin, writes, and speaks publicly, particularly about women and leadership.

Pretty impressive, right? 

I bet there are even more impressive women in your own state. So look them up. 

ALSO, celebrate the women in Your. Own. History.

One of the things I did on my trip was visit family and look at old family photographs. I got to see a picture of my great, great, great grandmother!?! Talk to your moms, aunts, grandmothers and others to learn about the women you came from.  

This month's 2011 theme is "Our History is Our Strength." 

I hope you find both.

Happy Women's History Month!!!