While I am truly overjoyed for my friends who have met their Mr. Right and gotten married recently, if I see one more facebook photo album of a wedding, I may scream. Or cry.
Admittedly, I do view every photo of every album - to stow away ideas for my future wedding, of course (as though this is a really urgent task!?!) - but it is painful at times. I think it is safe to say that being single sucks in the month of June.
But, not so, according to the authors of a new book: Last One Down the Aisle Wins - 10 keys to a fabulous single life now & an even better marriage later.
They argue that women should get to know themselves, gain independence, control their own finances, follow their passions, work on their education and careers, travel, etc. before marrying. In fact, they think women should wait until they are out of their 20s before marrying.
To be honest, I haven't read the book yet, only the article found at the link above but it seems a bit extreme; I'm thinking there is a happy medium, maybe 3 or 4 years after graduating rather than right after college or waiting until your 30.
It all depends, however, on when you meet "the one." Whether you wait a day or a decade, it is worth the wait and you shouldn't settle. I LOVE the way they explained that:
"What about this idea of "settling" for a Mr. Right Now — should young women still hold out for "the one"?
What a depressing message to send young women: You'll never find “the one”, so you should just settle for the best one who'll agree to marry you. Horrid! We not only urge women to hold out for Mr. Right, we also encourage them not to settle for themselves in their twenties. When a woman spends her single years becoming the best version of herself, what she's looking for in in a guy/husband/father to her children will inevitably evolve. She'll naturally begin to value character over charisma, connection over charm. This evolution will lead her to be attracted to a man with whom she can build a great life ... voila ... Mr. Right! But she simply won't be able to spot him until she's Mrs. Right. And that takes time."
So, all my single ladies, I hope you read the article and might even read the book. Either way, be encouraged because as the article points out, people who delay their marriage until after the age of 25 cut the chance of divorce in half.
In other words, single may suck now - particularly during the wedding month - but it can pay off in the end.
In the meantime, here are a few of my favorite songs for a soundtrack to singleness...
If you're feeling old-school and desperate: Queen's Somebody to Love
If you're feeling alone and impatient: John Mayer's Love Song For No One
If you're feeling optimistic and hopeful: Michael Buble's Haven't Met You Yet
And, finally, a nod to the title of this post, if you're feeling defiant in your singleness: Beyonce's Single Ladies
