This is not because of any moral stance, simply that I'm busy and never tan but simply freckle and burn.
However, in recent years, I have begun to have a moral dilemma in dealing with bathing suits.
Several friends and I have discussed if we should... quit wearing bikinis.
Gasp.
Many people think it's ludicrous
Or prudish
To contemplate another option.
Even though I am an adult and now live on my own, I am sure that my father would beat my 24-year-old butt if I tried to walk around in public in my bra and underwear. But a bikini - oh, don't worry dad - this bra and panties are waterproof so all ethical issues are now removed.
????
When it comes to bathing suits, modesty is pushed to the side because these are for the beach, not the bedroom. Duh.
I am just not so sure.
And then of course there are all the feminist notions out there that a woman should be able to wear (or not wear) whatever she wants and a man can't touch her or judge her... in a 3-piece suit or a 2-piece bikini.
True. I agree that even if I was walking around absolutely naked, no man has a right to touch me or rape me.
But, even so, I'm don't see how women are supposed to be empowered by wearing a bikini.
Revealing so much of ourselves serves who... ? Women?
It is hardly empowering to be prancing around half-naked for many of my friends.
I have countless conversations with women who hate going to the beach, putting their bodies on display fearing they will be judged by other girls for not being thin/toned/pretty enough. Further, no one has to voice a word and women already kill their confidence at the beach with self-hatred talk comparing themselves to the twigs with big boobs and barbie-like long legs.
I do wish we could all just embrace ourselves as we are but the truth is that most women do not. But, here is to hoping that we can get a bikini body this way:
Or we could all just take a stance to quit wearing the bikini.
I get not wanting to have tan lines... or burn lines as is my usual case. So go for a strapless top. But, not having a tan belly? Is this really a problem? How many people really see your stomach? Do you display it anywhere BUT the beach?
Back to the question of who it serves when women wear bikinis.
I'm thinking men more than women.
This is not a Christian issue of worrying over a man or woman's purity, though many take that angle.
This is just a freaking self-respect issue and I think we don't need to let it all hang out in front of a bunch of a strangers in public.
I like the way Jessica Rey phrased it:
"Modesty isn't about covering up our bodies because they're bad. Modesty isn't about hiding ourselves. It's about revealing our dignity."
Rey has recently added a lot to this discussion of modesty and doing away with bikinis through this video presentation and also her line of modest retro swimwear, inspired by Audrey Hepburn.
So there you have it.
Perhaps I'm a prude but those are my thoughts on modesty and bikinis ;)
you have accepted that "modesty" is a truth. It is not. who are you to decide what is modest and what isn't? if you feel self hatred when you wear a bikini to the beach, that is on YOU. no one can tell you how to feel. there are social faux paus, sure, but then again, who the fuck cares? if i am feeling self conscious at the beach, guess what i do? i wear a shirt. How fair is it to tell people that they should stop wearing a bikini because they are "disrespecting" themselves? Women who are jealous of the thinner women who actually look good in a bikini should realize something. most of those women worked very very hard to get that body. it takes hours a day for years for some people to get an athletically fit body. I for one feel empowered when i see physically healthy women.
ReplyDeleteif you are a self hater, that is on you. leave the rest of us who arent prudes alone.
Hey Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI actually don't hate my body at all and am very pleased with and proud of it. I run, walk and do yoga almost daily and eat well, so I totally agree that women (and men) work hard to maintain an athletically fit body.
And I am empowered by my strong and healthy body, I just don't choose to display so much of it to the world.
I would also like to clarify that (like the photo above on how to get a bikini body), I don't think we have to all be athletic or a certain size or shape to go to the beach.
Nor do I claim modesty is "truth." As I said, these were just my thoughts, my humble ramblings, on something my friends and I have been processing lately.
Thanks for your thoughts. We are all entitled to our own.