Stereotypes: Terrorism, Feminism and Classical Music

Stereotypes

Stereotypes suck because they limit people - both those doing the stereotyping and those being stereotyped - because stereotypes build boxes that keep people in... and out.

These boxes block off potential - the potential for that person in your eyes and maybe in their own eyes of who they are and can become.

Take, for example, when we stereotype blondes as dumb: we lose the potential knowledge they could share because we write them off as ignorant AND they might lose the potential to believe they can be brainier because they live up to the dumb blonde stereotype.

Terrorism

But, given today's mark in history as the 10th anniversary of the September 11th attacks, I'm sure a different stereotype comes to mind for many of us:

Racial profiling that "Muslim" = "terrorist"

This became so common that this t-shirt was created:

Countless stereotypes exist about Muslims, especially in the media in relation to terrorism. However, according to NBC news, a " 2009 [Pew Research Center] study, Muslims in the United States are much more likely to say that suicide bombings are never justified in defense of Islam than Muslims in other countries. Almost eight in 10 American Muslims say that such attacks are never defensible, compared to 70 percent of Muslims in Britain, 64 percent of Muslims in France, and just 17 percent of Muslims who live in the Palestinian territory."

So, perhaps more Americans should resist the urge to judge a book by its cover... or a person by his or her religion. 

Feminism

I have been judged by my religion before. Countless feminists have been horrified and even in disbelief that I am not only Christian but Baptist. Many people think "Baptist" and "Feminist" cannot be one in the same but, for me they are because my faith is empowering not oppressive. 

Beyond being Baptist, though, I am often judged by my "cover" or appearance because I don't look like the typical stereotype of a feminist: manly, hairy, no bra, etc. (And, for the record, most feminists don't look like that!)

But most people who operate under those stereotypes, would probably never look at me and guess I'm a feminist. I actually look very mainstream... more like a brunette Barbie than say, Andrea Dworkin. 

And, I get judged for that ALL the time...

I have interacted with people who see me dressed in pink or florals or high high heels and assume I am vapid, materialistic and shallow. Then, I open my mouth and I can literally see an expression shoot across their face when they are surprised to see that I am reasonably intelligent and have something of value to add to the conversation.

But because the cover of my book is more like Barbie, I am boxed into a stereotype when in reality I just enjoy fashion after having endured uniforms for years in high school. It just so happens that instead of being emo/goth/grunge or some other counter-culture look, my fashion sense is undeniably and even excessively feminine... very Southern Belle you might say ;)

But, just like being Baptist empowers me, so does my femininity. I feel no need to hide the fact that I am a woman and I have absolutely no desire to look like a man.... I just happen to enjoy wearing skirts, makeup and perfume. This Southern Belle image I have, however, does not reduce my desire to learn, lead, or do anything else I set my mind to. 

Classical Music

Just to end on a fun note after this rather serious post, here is another person who looks a little different and shatters a stereotype while doing so :)

What do you think of when you think classical music? 

Nerdy guy, no fashion sense, elevator music? I have to admit, I sometimes boxed classical musicians into a stereotype similar to that : / 

However, a friend of mine recently introduced me to David Garret. Is it bad that I was hooked before I even heard him play??? ;) 

Anyways, he is from Germany and one of the fastest violinists in the world AND he modernizes the music by playing current songs... like Michael Jackson's Smooth Criminal: 

He has many more songs that might change the way you think about classical music :)

We may not all struggle with boxing in or being boxed in by these particular stereotypes of terrorist, feminist or classical music but we all face stereotypes. 

Next time you're about to judge someone by their appearance...

think OUTSIDE the box...

and let them show you who they truly are, even if who they truly are seems as incompatible as a Southern Belle (Baptist) Feminist :)

Refuting the Top 10 Feminist Stereotypes

To begin with, I’d like to address the type of feminist that I am and, in so doing, prove that there is not only one way to be a feminist. People, especially in the South and even in my family, throw out those same old tired stereotypes of the hairy, lesbian, man-hater. I can assure you that I do not fit that description and neither do most of the feminists I have met.

In May of this year, DJ Nelson posted a list of the top 10 Feminist Stereotypes on the All Diva Media blog. They included the following:
1. Feminists hate men
2. Feminists hate the idea of family
3. Feminists are masculine and unattractive
4. Feminists hate God
5. Feminists don’t shave
6. Feminists are all pro-choice
7. Feminists can’t be stay at home moms
8. Feminists whine about everything
9. Men are not feminists
10. All people who label themselves as feminists believe in the exact same things

I refute every one of these stereotypes because:

1. I do not hate men but rather have about 3-7 crushes going on at any given time and definitely enjoy the company of men on a friendship and romantic level.

2. I LOVE my family and fully intend to have one of my own one day, biologically or by adoption.
3. I am about as girly girl as you can get. As for being unattractive, I like to think that I am not but I suppose beauty is in the eye of the beholder… and the media which I will address in later blogs I am sure. I certainly fit some of the media’s standards of “beauty” by staying fit, fashionable, and manicured with makeup, painted nails, styled hair, etc. but that is the Southern Belle in me wanting to be dolled up - As for if that is my willing choice or a socialized requirement that I subconsciously feel the need to meet, I am still processing. Either way I enjoy being girly and definitely break that masculine stereotype.

4. I most definitely do not hate God but love and worship him to the best of my ability as an active Christian. I do not feel that Feminism and Faith are mutually exclusive.

5. I shave regularly and feel bad for boys that don’t because the thought of armpit hair grosses me out and I feel like it would be a nuisance. I do question why women have to shave and why men, as a collective gender – not just the occasional swimmer - never do. Perhaps there will be a later blog on that.

6. I have not fully made up my mind on this. I hate the thought of an innocent life being ended before it has the chance to reach full potential but I also hate the idea of a woman and her body being controlled by the nearly all male government possibly forcing an unwanted pregnancy on a woman AND the less than loved/protected/encouraged/provided for existence that child might face. I often fall back to the separation of Church and State in that the government should not be influenced by religious doctrine so I would technically take a pro-choice stance though on a personal level I would never encourage abortion.

7. Feminists certainly can be stay at home moms – look to the first wave of the women’s movement in the 1800s. It was begun by middle class, white women, many of whom were stay at home moms who felt oppressed in that role and chose to change it, essentially becoming feminists. Women today can do the very same thing AND women can be feminists but still be a stay at home mom if they CHOOSE to and don’t feel oppressed. In fact, if I am afforded the opportunity to do just that and be with my future children while they are young and reaching so many firsts in their life, I will more than likely take it.

8. I don’t whine about everything but I do whine BUT who doesn’t. Don’t men whine? Don’t normal women whine? Don’t racists, sexists, politicians, homeless, teachers, doctors, Christians, Muslims, Americans, Australians, [insert any people group] whine!?! Furthermore, if one put the shoe on the other foot they might see why the other group has a reason to “whine” or perhaps more accurately, “pose a threat to the status quo” causing those in power to belittle the submissive group as “whiners” simply to preserve their position of power?

9. Sure men are feminists. I know some. You probably do too. We need more of them.

10. Heck no, we don’t all agree! But who does? See number 8; do they all agree? No, and why should they… that would be terribly boring.

Having said that, you may disagree with what I have just presented as my opinion and that is fine – that is Feminist in fact ;) I don’t expect you to agree with all that I have just mentioned and that is my point. Just as my answers break the mold of those stereotypes, others’ answers will break the mold of my answers further destroying those stereotypes. So go ahead and prove them wrong; we don’t all fit into one itty bitty box.