Point of View is Important - February 14th and Conception ;)

Point of view IS important.

The exact same thing can be quite different depending on your point of view.

Take this past Monday, February 14th, for example.

To most in a relationship or on the cusp of one, February 14th is Valentine's Day... full of love and chocolate and kisses.

To everyone else, February 14th is Singles Awareness Day... one of my friends recently pointed out that its abbreviation actually spells S.A.D.

Ouch.

But in reality, February 14th is just a day... it only changes with your point of view (aka relationship status).

I recently read another great example where the exact same thing changes depending on the point of view:

Conception.

Yes, for real...

Thanks to my Gender and Society textbook ;)

Here is what it said:

You've probably imagined sperm as hardy warriors swimming purposefully upstream, against the current, on a suicide mission to fertilize that egg, or die. (p29)

Right? Now, that clearly is the point of view of the SPERM. And it sounds like all I have ever heard before about conception: to quote Dori out of context from Finding Nemo, I imagine the sperm: "Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming."  All with intense purpose. Maybe even wearing helmets or goggles ;)

However, my book continues and shows a very uncommon take on conception:

Here's what it actually looks like: [A] wastefully huge swarm of sperm weakly flops along, its members bumping into walls and flailing aimlessly through thick strands of mucus. Eventually, through sheer odds of pinball-like bouncing... a few sperm end up close enough to an egg. As they mill around, the egg selects one and reels it in, pinning it down in spite of its efforts to escape. It's no contest, really. The gigantic hardy egg yanks the tiny sperm inside, distills out the chromosomes, and sets out to become an embryo. (p 29, quoting"The Aggressive Egg" by David Freeman)

Definitely different, right? That point of view clearly comes from the EGG.

Point of view IS important.

So, whether it is February 14th or conception or whatever else you're dealing with... be sure to consider your point of view - you can choose to view the situation as a glass half full or a glass half empty.

And if this past Monday got you down (or S.A.D.), at the risk of being too corny, I remind you that there are other fish in the sea and I'll leave you with this little motto from Dori, my favorite Finding Nemo character:

Lastly, I apologize if, like Nemo's dad, you get stuck with that song in your head ;)

The Bachelor is Wrong... Biologically

While at SEWSA, I was speaking to a woman who works at a college. What she could not understand was how many women flocked to and fawned all over the guys on campus.

Assuming it was much like my school where the girls greatly outnumber the guys, I said it was probably just that: the guys were in short supply and high demand so they got the pick of the litter. However, she said her school had an almost even break in the girl to guy ratio.

This started a whole discussion on how society might be leading women and men to believe that regardless of ratios, men still get the pick of the litter.

My favorite quote from this conversation was when she said, "I mean take The Bachelor for example... all those women going after one guy!?! That just doesn't make sense. Even biologically, think about it, a ton of sperm go after only one egg. That's how it should be in life."

Amen, sister. I wish.

Biologically it seems the case. Socially though, it isn't lived out. Women chase after men rather than the other way around... after a certain age anyway.

I recently did lunch with a little girl that I babysit who is 5 AND, she was quick to clarify, a half years old. In our conversation, she mentioned her boyfriend. He is not imaginary and he is not her first. In fact, he is not her second but her third boyfriend. I repeat, she is on her third boyfriend and is not yet six years old!?!

Not to beat a dead horse, but - reminder - I am single. And I am 21. AND, unlike the boys at her school, I do not have guys lined up around the corner for me.

I started to wonder why.

At such a young age without the extensive socialization from more adult movies, tv, etc. in the media, and without caring for any "cootie-spreading" sexual acts, these boys are just responding biologically to go after this lovely little girl in their class.

Sadly, boys my age have been more socialized and I think they have gotten the message through media that goes against biology saying that women should chase after them.

Well, ladies, I say we need to have some self-respect and some self-restraint. Let's stop boosting these boys' egos and quit chasing after them.

We. Are. Worthy. Of. Pursuit.

Let's get back to biology and let them chase after us...